literature

Tale as Old as TIme Chapter 3

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Erik-of-Music's avatar
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Literature Text

I awoke in the room with the fireplace again. Except this time I was alone, or so I thought. I sat up to immediately lay back down. My head was throbbing. Just as I was about to drift back to sleep, I heard two voices arguing. The two voices I had heard before, Lumiere and Cogsworth. I looked around to try and find the two men. That's when I knew… I looked straight into the almost hidden eyes of the candelabra knowing exactly who it was. "Ah, you are awake Mademoiselle!" he exclaimed. "What happened to you?" he looked at me and in his eyes I immediately understood everything. That flash of light hadn't just been something simple, it had been an enchantress. 'Then what did he turn into I wonder?' It almost seemed like Lumiere knew what I was thinking. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you." Then the door opened to reveal the beautiful blue eyes. He was definitely changed, his face was no longer smooth and flawless. He was almost unrecognizably changed. Yet I think what surprised him the most was my reaction…
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The young girl turned towards the door, and didn't seem startled at all at the sight of the prince's new appearance. It was almost like she saw his soul not his face. The silence that filled the room was nothing compared to the electric current passing through the eyes of the young pair. They both stared into each other's eyes with an intensity that was almost unearthly.
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He stared at me like he expected me to run screaming. I won't lie I have never seen such a face, yet there was something there that was kind. It was like he pitied me for having to be in his presence. I first felt pity then I looked at those eyes, and it was like we saw the other's soul. It was like nothing I had ever experienced. He fascinated me, not because of his appearance…He was like no one I had ever met. He was different, like me. We sat there looking at each other for what felt like a few moments. Then I realized that in reality it had been almost ten minutes. It was almost like I couldn't look away. Then he opened his mouth to speak, and then I knew…
Well umm. here's another chapter I would love some feedback! This chapter is ALOT longer than the first 2. I'm thinking of putting the first two together, and making them chapter 1. What do you think?
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AVthreads's avatar
Looks really good!! I think combining the first two would be a good idea, you could probably put all three together too. I think some more backround knowledge of what is going on could help, and describing more of what's going on. Otherwise, I think it's pretty good!